Every parent is well aware that children should not be shouted at because shouting is not an educational method. A raised voice and a nervous tone have a negative effect on the baby and his emotional development. In addition, shouting can have a bad effect on the brain.
Although we know that you cannot shout at children, it can be different in practice. Sometimes it’s really hard to hold back your emotions and hold back from raising your tone when a child is pushing us to the limit of our endurance. The most important thing, however, is to work on yourself. Want to know how not to shout at your baby? Later in this article, you’ll find some practical tips to help you control your negative emotions and stop yourself from screaming in a crisis.
Scream - why is it bad?
I don’t think anyone likes being yelled at, especially children. When a child is shouted at them, they feel fear and insecure. He is simply afraid that his safety is at stake and that the person he loves and trusts is the threat. He feels lost and scared, often does not know how to react, causing him to cry or run away to take shelter.
It is important to realize that screaming has a negative effect on your baby. By screaming, he can develop emotional problems that affect not only his current functioning, but also his future life. If there are constant screams in the house, with time a cheerful and joyful child becomes fearful, loses self-confidence and closes in on himself. Therefore, it is worthwhile to think twice about how a scream will affect a child before raising our voice to it.
How not to shout at your child?
First, let’s consider when we scream the most and why. Let’s try to find the cause of our anger and frustration. Then it will be easier to control and eliminate it.
In order not to shout at the child, you need to constantly work on yourself and often rise to the heights of patience. The following tips can help:
- Take care of yourself, because nerves and frustration are often the result of our malaise, lack of sleep, being hungry, etc.
- Don’t hide your feelings and emotions. If you feel bad or you don’t like something, especially in his behavior, you have the right to tell him about it, but do so in a calm and normal tone of speech.
- Don’t make assumptions that your child is acting a certain way because he or she has bad intentions towards you. Perhaps he cannot do otherwise, so try to explain everything politely and accurately, while teaching the correct patterns of behavior.
- Adapt the requirements to the age of the child and do not overestimate his abilities. Often the problem is too high ambition, and yet no one likes to be put under pressure.
- Be consistent in your actions and calmly execute requests. Instead of repeating commands several times when your child does not follow them, show that they have to deal with the consequences of their actions.
- Learn to deal with negative emotions. Check what calms you down quickly (e.g. counting to 10) and use this method whenever you want to scream.
Yelling at your baby - where to get help?
Sometimes the cause of our constant nervousness and emotional reactions is a child’s problems, such as learning difficulties, problems with experiencing and showing emotions, and developmental disorders. However, it is important to realize that when they occur, screaming is not a solution. Besides, the fact that we will be nervous will not help the child at all, but will only aggravate the problem. Therefore, in a situation where we are unable to help a child on our own, it is worth asking a specialist, in this case a psychologist, for help.
A child psychologist is a person who looks for the cause of certain behaviors and problems in a child and tries to find a solution to them. It assesses the child’s development and functioning in the family, which is helpful in making the correct diagnosis. It is worth emphasizing that the psychologist works not only with the child, but also with its parents and the immediate environment.
Going to a psychologist with your child is the first step to improving communication between you and your child. If we cannot cope with our emotions and often shout at the child, it is also worth thinking about going to a psychologist yourself and trying to find the cause of your behavior. Perhaps it is not the child’s behavior that contributes to the impulsive reactions, but our problems, which we have to work through on our own so as not to take advantage of the child.